There’s a huge difference between someone who’s simply infatuated with you and someone who’s genuinely in love with you.
This distinction all comes down to authenticity. Being infatuated with someone means being attracted to them on a superficial level. However, genuine love is much deeper, and it involves truly knowing and accepting the other person.
According to psychology, there are certain signs that can help you differentiate between infatuation and real love.
And those of us in the know, we’re aware there are tell-tale indicators that reveal when someone is really in love with you.
In this article, I’ll explore nine signs that someone is genuinely in love with you.
Let’s get started.
1) They really listen
Real love isn’t just about grand gestures and sweet words. More often, it’s about the little things, like truly listening to what the other person is saying.
According to psychologist Carl Rogers, active or deep listening is at the heart of every healthy relationship
This means that the person isn’t just hearing your words; they’re engaging with you and responding in a way that shows they genuinely care about what you’re saying.
Think about it. When someone loves you, they want to know your thoughts, your feelings, your experiences. They want to understand you better and hence they listen – truly listen.
2) They remember the little things
Now, this one hits close to home for me.
My partner has this uncanny ability to remember even the smallest details about things I’ve mentioned in passing.
We could be talking about anything, from my favorite childhood book to a dessert I’d like to try, and weeks later, she’ll surprise me with it.
It’s not just about the surprise, though. It’s the fact that she listened and remembered something that matters to me.
Remembering small details shows a level of emotional investment that goes beyond mere infatuation.
3) They make sacrifices for you
Another clear sign of genuine love is when someone is willing to make sacrifices for you. This doesn’t necessarily mean grand, movie-style gestures. More often, it’s about giving up something they want or need to ensure your happiness or comfort.
Did you know that studies have shown that people who are genuinely in love are more willing to sacrifice their own needs and desires for the sake of their partner?
It’s a fascinating insight into human behavior, revealing how true love often involves putting the other person first.
4) They show genuine concern for your well-being
When someone truly loves you, they worry about you.
They care about your physical health, your emotional state, and your overall well-being.
It’s not about being overly protective or intrusive, but rather a sincere concern that stems from a place of love.
For instance, if they check in when you’re not feeling well, or if they express concern when they feel you’re over-stressed or not taking care of yourself, it’s a clear sign of their genuine affection for you.
5) They respect your boundaries
In any healthy relationship, respect is key. And when someone truly loves you, they respect your boundaries.
They understand that you are an individual with your own needs and preferences, and they honor that.
For example, if you’ve made it clear that you need some alone time after a long day at work, someone who genuinely loves you will understand and respect this.
They won’t push you to interact when you’re not ready or disregard your need for personal space.
6) They are your biggest cheerleader
When someone is genuinely in love with you, they become your biggest fan. They believe in you, even when you don’t believe in yourself.
Their support isn’t tied to your successes or failures; it’s unwavering and constant.
Genuine love involves mutual respect and support.
They celebrate your victories as if they were their own and provide comfort during your failures.
They encourage you to chase your dreams, no matter how big or small they may be.
There’s something incredibly heartwarming about having someone in your corner who believes in you unconditionally.
It’s the kind of love that lifts you up, pushes you forward, and reminds you of your worth even in your lowest moments.
This level of support and encouragement is a tell-tale sign of genuine love.
7) They apologize when they’re wrong
I’ve found that one of the most profound indicators of genuine love is the ability to say “I’m sorry.” It’s about acknowledging mistakes, taking responsibility, and making an effort to rectify things.
In my own relationship, we’ve had our share of disagreements.
But what always stood out to me was my partner’s willingness to admit when she was wrong and apologize. It wasn’t about pride or ego; it was about respect and love.
Apologizing isn’t easy; it requires humility and a certain level of vulnerability.
But when someone loves you genuinely, they put their pride aside and prioritize the health of the relationship over being right.
This ability to apologize is a powerful sign of genuine love.
8) They make you feel valued
Feeling valued is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship. When someone genuinely loves you, they make you feel important and cherished.
They appreciate your qualities, both big and small, and they let you know it.
This feeling of being valued can encompass many things – from acknowledging your contributions to showing gratitude for the things you do.
It’s about making you feel important and cherished in their life.
If someone consistently makes you feel like you matter, like your presence makes a difference in their life, it’s a strong sign that they genuinely love you.
Their actions and words remind you that you are loved and appreciated just as you are.
9) They love you for who you are
At the end of the day, the most telling sign that someone is genuinely in love with you is that they love you for who you are.
Love involves the nonjudgmental total unconditional acceptance of the other.
They accept your strengths and your weaknesses, your perfections and imperfections.
They love and accept the real you, without trying to change or mold you into someone else.
When someone loves you genuinely, they don’t want you to be anything other than yourself. They celebrate your unique qualities and embrace your flaws. They see the beauty in your authenticity, and they cherish it.
Final thoughts: Love is a journey
Understanding the intricacies of love is a complex and deeply personal journey. It’s not always easy to discern between genuine love and infatuation, but psychology provides us with some insightful pointers.
The signs we’ve covered here, from active listening to unconditional support and acceptance, are key indicators of genuine love. However, it’s essential to remember that everyone expresses love differently. What may seem like a sure sign of love for one might not hold true for another.
Psychologist Robert Sternberg proposed the Triangular Theory of Love, suggesting that intimacy, passion, and commitment are the three components of love. It’s interesting to note that all these elements can be seen in the signs we’ve discussed.
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